Topic: Misc. stuff

[taco_harvell]

Four-year-old Tucker Jones attended the vacation Bible school  at our church. The theme was "Discipleship and Saving Mother Earth." His mother, Trish Jones, asked Tucker what he had learned.

He immediately told her all bout "Jesus and the 12 recycles."

[taco_harvell]

The old pastor made it to a practice to visit the parish school one day a week. He walked into the 4th grade class, where the children were studying the states, and asked them how many states they could name.

They came up with about 40 names. He jokingly told them that in his day students knew the names of all the states.

One lad raised his hand and said, "Yes, but in those days there were only 13."

[taco_harvell]

 
Tired after a day of hiking, a traveler stopped
at an inn run by a holy order. He went to the
dining room and ordered fish and chips. Perhaps
it was sheer exhaustion or perhaps they were
really good, but he decided that these were the
tastiest fish and chips he'd ever had. He
insisted on complimenting the chef.

He went into the kitchen, where he encountered
a man in a brown robe with a white rope belt,
clerical collar and bald on top standing over a
stove. He asked the man, "Are you the fish,
Friar?"

To which the man replied, "No, I'm the chip monk."

[taco_harvell]

In our Anglican church  (the Catholic church
too), each service begins with a greeting.
The officiating clergyman says, "The Lord be
with you." The congregation used to respond
by saying, "And with thy spirit."

But with the modernizing of the liturgy, the
minister now says, "The Lord be with you," and
everyone responds with, "And also with you."

One Sunday a visiting bishop went to a church
where the sound system was known to be old and
unreliable. As he approached the microphone, he
tapped it several times and finally said,
"There's something wrong with this!"

Without hesitation, the whole congregation
answered faithfully, "And also with you."